I have had several of you remind me over the last few weeks that I haven't been blogging. While I am so very thankful for my loyal readers, and the fact that you enjoy my blog, I have a confession to make. I have not been blogging lately for one reason, and one reason only; If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all. Lately, I just haven't had anything nice to say.
First, I have to complain about the weather. I mean what is up with all these teasers?? Its almost May, and I am expecting consistent 60 degree, sunny days. Instead, I am given cold, dreary days. I can handle the drear when its warm outside, but by past struggles with depression seem to rear their ugly head about this same time every year. Winter doesn't bother me....its Spring, or at least the first month and a half of Spring.
Secondly, I have been struggling with my self-image a lot lately! Last summer, I dropped 30 lbs. I was motivated and happy, and energetic. Well over the course of the last 6 months, some of that weight has slowly creeped its way back in, even though I have still maintained a majority of the healthy lifestyle that I started last year. So it puts a real damper on one's self image, when you try to be healthier and don't succeed. Hoping that the soon to appear nicer weather (see previous paragraph) will change this funk around and will make it easier for me to give myself a little kick.
And lastly, and unfortunately the most influential thing of the "If you don't have anything nice to say" phrase is my children. The weather change seems to be affecting their behavior as well. I am finding myself dealing with more and more stubbornness and challenges of my authority, and frankly, ain't nobody got time for that. Zoey, the 7 year old, seems to have an argument for everything I say. The talking back and questioning of authority is really getting to be too much. I lose my temper with her on a daily basis. Nothing makes you feel like a great mom more then the guilt you feel after losing your temper of your kids (insert sarcasm here). Me thinks I need a permanent time out.
Blake. That one word sentence says so much. To know my son, is to truly respect him. I am so grateful for the friends in our lives who take the time to understand Blake and peel back his layers to see the true gem he can be. I need a reminder of that so often. But I fear we are losing ground. It feels as though we have taken 6 steps back. The hitting has returned. I really, really despise the hitting, and no matter how many times we stress that hitting is not how we show our anger, the message doesn't get through. When he's mad, he tends to hit. And it doesn't even need to be explosive anger either. A kid could not play the game the right way and he hits. I could tell him no, he can't do that right now, and he hits me. His therapists and teacher tell me to ignore a lot of the bad behavior because he is doing it for the response. But I cannot ignore the hitting; yet when ever I address it, it seems to make it worse. This anger issue, was one of the very first concerns we had with Blake over two years ago. Before the diagnosis, before therapies and school, the anger and hitting and throwing things were what caused us the most fear. And now, here we are back at what I feel is not too far from square one. Its been a very frustrating last few weeks, and I don't see much in the way of progress.
That is why I am not blogging. Because to be honest, I just don't have anything nice to say.
4/11/13
Page 11
So, as usual, the last week has gotten away from me without a single blog post. Sorry to all my dedicated readers out there! I promise to get better :)
This morning, at 8 am we had Blake's IEP meeting....the third one in the last 14 months. This meeting was tremendously important, as it would outline the entire school year for next year. For those of you who are unaware, IEP stands for Individualized Education Program. All states have some form of IEP for children in the school system who require a learning plan tailored to their specific needs. This allows the parents to be advocates for their children and during the annual review, they are able to voice their concerns and discuss the goals they have for their child in the coming year.
Blake just turned 4 in February, so due to Illinois laws, he will attend Pre-K for another year. The 2013-2014 school year will actually be his 3rd school year. The most fantastic news out of all of this, is that Blake will be able to return to our "home-school" (our district school) for next year. He has been attending a school in another district because they offer the specialized Early Childhood class that he has been in. It is considered to be a Special Education Pre-K for children with special needs. His teacher, was singing his praises this morning about how far he has come in the 14 months she has had him in her class. And as his mom, I couldn't agree more. He has made so much progress.
Blake's IEP report is 16 pages long. At the meeting were his current teacher at High Mount, his new teacher at William Holliday, the Principal of WH, the social worker for WH and High Mount, the OT of WH and High Mount, and the Special Education teacher at WH, and Kevin, Blake and myself. Its a little daunting, and the meeting lasts merely an hour. That's not a lot of time to try and get a whole entire school year in place. However, one of the best things about Pre-K is seeing the teacher everyday and being able to work with her on an as needed basis. After sitting with his future teacher today, I feel extremely confident that she "gets" Blake and his needs and will be a wonderful teacher for him.
But the truly, most amazing thing about this whole morning, is one little blurb in the middle of page 11 of the report. It states that for the 2013-2014 school year, Blake will be 100% REGULAR EDUCATION and 0% SPECIAL EDUCATION. His current placement is the exact opposite. He is 100% Special Education now. I am welled up with tears and emotion right now as I type. And I understand and realize that this is only for this year, and when he transitions to Kindergarten, it will be a whole different ballgame. But for now, and for the next year, my boy will be like all the other 4 year old Pre-K students.
I can't help but feel like rejoicing as I turn around and see the enormous mountain behind me, and look around the beautiful valley that I am standing in. I ignore the giant mountain range that lies beyond the horizon. Right now, in the moment, I feel as though I can breathe. And I know that its just a piece of paper with some writing on it. But it stands for how far we have come in the last 2 years. It stands for all the tantrums and meltdowns that we have made it through. And it stands for the countless hours of therapies and the nights I have cried myself to sleep, thinking I can't help my boy. 100% Regular Education!! And even if its only for the next 12 months, I'll take :)
Jenn :)
This morning, at 8 am we had Blake's IEP meeting....the third one in the last 14 months. This meeting was tremendously important, as it would outline the entire school year for next year. For those of you who are unaware, IEP stands for Individualized Education Program. All states have some form of IEP for children in the school system who require a learning plan tailored to their specific needs. This allows the parents to be advocates for their children and during the annual review, they are able to voice their concerns and discuss the goals they have for their child in the coming year.
Blake just turned 4 in February, so due to Illinois laws, he will attend Pre-K for another year. The 2013-2014 school year will actually be his 3rd school year. The most fantastic news out of all of this, is that Blake will be able to return to our "home-school" (our district school) for next year. He has been attending a school in another district because they offer the specialized Early Childhood class that he has been in. It is considered to be a Special Education Pre-K for children with special needs. His teacher, was singing his praises this morning about how far he has come in the 14 months she has had him in her class. And as his mom, I couldn't agree more. He has made so much progress.
Blake's IEP report is 16 pages long. At the meeting were his current teacher at High Mount, his new teacher at William Holliday, the Principal of WH, the social worker for WH and High Mount, the OT of WH and High Mount, and the Special Education teacher at WH, and Kevin, Blake and myself. Its a little daunting, and the meeting lasts merely an hour. That's not a lot of time to try and get a whole entire school year in place. However, one of the best things about Pre-K is seeing the teacher everyday and being able to work with her on an as needed basis. After sitting with his future teacher today, I feel extremely confident that she "gets" Blake and his needs and will be a wonderful teacher for him.
But the truly, most amazing thing about this whole morning, is one little blurb in the middle of page 11 of the report. It states that for the 2013-2014 school year, Blake will be 100% REGULAR EDUCATION and 0% SPECIAL EDUCATION. His current placement is the exact opposite. He is 100% Special Education now. I am welled up with tears and emotion right now as I type. And I understand and realize that this is only for this year, and when he transitions to Kindergarten, it will be a whole different ballgame. But for now, and for the next year, my boy will be like all the other 4 year old Pre-K students.
I can't help but feel like rejoicing as I turn around and see the enormous mountain behind me, and look around the beautiful valley that I am standing in. I ignore the giant mountain range that lies beyond the horizon. Right now, in the moment, I feel as though I can breathe. And I know that its just a piece of paper with some writing on it. But it stands for how far we have come in the last 2 years. It stands for all the tantrums and meltdowns that we have made it through. And it stands for the countless hours of therapies and the nights I have cried myself to sleep, thinking I can't help my boy. 100% Regular Education!! And even if its only for the next 12 months, I'll take :)
Jenn :)
4/1/13
LIGHT IT UP BLUE!!
Today is April 1st, 2013. It is a Monday and it marks the start of National Autism Awareness Month. I have decided to take this month and use my blog to raise awareness. I have many friends and readers who have expressed what little information they have about Autism and what it exactly is. Today, I will answer the what it is, and over the net few weeks, I will go more in depth about statistics and the far reaching effects of Autism.
As many of you already know, we have only been aware of Blake's diagnosis for a little over a year. But we are not strangers to the disorder as my oldest half-brother, Grant, also is on the autism spectrum. It has been a huge blessing to have my father and step-mom acting as mentors, as they have been forging this road for over 10 years now. And even though Grant and Blake to not have all of the same characteristics they do share some, and advice and help over the last year has been wonderful.
Autism and ASD (autism spectrum disorder) are both terms used to describe a complex group of disorders of brain development. These disorders are characterized, in varying degrees, by difficulties in social interaction, verbal and nonverbal communication and repetitive behaviors. They include autistic disorder, Rett syndrome, childhood disintegrative disorder, pervasive developmental disorder-not otherwise specified (PDD-NOS) and Asperger syndrome. With the May 2013 publication of the new DSM-5 diagnostic manual, these autism subtypes will be merged into one umbrella diagnosis of ASD. ASD can be associated with intellectual disability, difficulties in motor coordination and attention and physical health issues such as sleep and gastrointestinal disturbances. Some persons with ASD excel in visual skills, music, math and art. Autism appears to have its roots in very early brain development. However, the most obvious signs of autism and symptoms of autism tend to emerge between 2 and 3 years of age. (Blake was diagnosed two weeks before his 3rd birthday.)
Autism statistics from the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) identify around 1 in 88 American children as on the autism spectrum–a ten-fold increase in prevalence in 40 years. Careful research shows that this increase is only partly explained by improved diagnosis and awareness. Studies also show that autism is four to five times more common among boys than girls. An estimated 1 out of 54 boys and 1 in 252 girls are diagnosed with autism in the United States.
As many of you already know, we have only been aware of Blake's diagnosis for a little over a year. But we are not strangers to the disorder as my oldest half-brother, Grant, also is on the autism spectrum. It has been a huge blessing to have my father and step-mom acting as mentors, as they have been forging this road for over 10 years now. And even though Grant and Blake to not have all of the same characteristics they do share some, and advice and help over the last year has been wonderful.
Autism and ASD (autism spectrum disorder) are both terms used to describe a complex group of disorders of brain development. These disorders are characterized, in varying degrees, by difficulties in social interaction, verbal and nonverbal communication and repetitive behaviors. They include autistic disorder, Rett syndrome, childhood disintegrative disorder, pervasive developmental disorder-not otherwise specified (PDD-NOS) and Asperger syndrome. With the May 2013 publication of the new DSM-5 diagnostic manual, these autism subtypes will be merged into one umbrella diagnosis of ASD. ASD can be associated with intellectual disability, difficulties in motor coordination and attention and physical health issues such as sleep and gastrointestinal disturbances. Some persons with ASD excel in visual skills, music, math and art. Autism appears to have its roots in very early brain development. However, the most obvious signs of autism and symptoms of autism tend to emerge between 2 and 3 years of age. (Blake was diagnosed two weeks before his 3rd birthday.)
Autism statistics from the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) identify around 1 in 88 American children as on the autism spectrum–a ten-fold increase in prevalence in 40 years. Careful research shows that this increase is only partly explained by improved diagnosis and awareness. Studies also show that autism is four to five times more common among boys than girls. An estimated 1 out of 54 boys and 1 in 252 girls are diagnosed with autism in the United States.
By way of comparison, more children are diagnosed with autism each year than with juvenile diabetes, AIDS or cancer, combined. ASD affects over 2 million individuals in the U.S. and tens of millions worldwide. Government autism statistics suggest that prevalence rates have increased 10 to 17 percent annually in recent years.
Until recent years, there was no answer as to what causes Autism. Through research, they are starting to discover that just as there is no one type of Autism, there is no one cause for Autism. The clearest evidence of these autism risk factors involves events before and during birth. They include advanced parental age at time of conception (both mom and dad), maternal illness during pregnancy and certain difficulties during birth, particularly those involving periods of oxygen deprivation to the baby’s brain. It is important to keep in mind that these factors, by themselves, do not cause autism. Rather, in combination with genetic risk factors, they appear to modestly increase risk.
Each individual with autism is unique. Many of those on the autism spectrum have exceptional abilities in visual skills, music and academic skills. About 40 percent have average to above average intellectual abilities. Indeed, many persons on the spectrum take deserved pride in their distinctive abilities and “atypical” ways of viewing the world. Others with autism have significant disability and are unable to live independently. About 25 percent of individuals with ASD are nonverbal but can learn to communicate using other means. Autism Speaks’ mission is to improve the lives of all those on the autism spectrum. For some, this means the development and delivery of more effective treatments that can address significant challenges in communication and physical health. For others, it means increasing acceptance, respect and support.
There is no test to determine if one has Autism, or ASD. Physicians and/or psychologists may administer a specially designed autism behavioral evaluation. After spending 1.5 hours in a room with us and Blake, a team of Psychologists, Speech Therapists and other therapists, diagnosed Blake as having mild to moderate Autism. They didn't even need to leave the room to discuss it. They already knew.
The Modified Checklist of Autism in Toddlers (M-CHAT) is a list of informative questions about your child. The answers can indicate whether he or she should be further evaluated by a specialist such as a developmental pediatrician, neurologist, psychiatrist or psychologist. (Take the M-CHAT here.)
Most of my information came from the Autism Speaks website. Its a great tool for individuals who would like to know more about Autism and ASD or if you are a family member of someone with ASD. Below you will find a chart showing the drastic increase in Autism diagnosis's over the years. Autism Speaks raises money for research to study Autism and to one day find the answers. However, there is a huge need for help for families with autistic children, especially as the lower functioning individuals reach adulthood. My brother will be turning 16 this year, and my dad is finding there is a large lack of resources out there.
I thank you for taking the time to read up on Autism. Tomorrow, April 2nd is National Autism Awareness Day and Autism Speaks asks the world to Light It Up Blue for the day. So if you see a blue light tomorrow, you will know what it is for.
Bar chart of the number (per 1,000 U.S. resident children aged 6–17) of children aged 6–17 who were served under the Individuals with Disabilities Education Act (IDEA) with a diagnosis of autism, from 1996 through 2007.
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